Trevor XXV, 2022 - The Belfry
Trevor Trophy 2022 – From relevance to critical.
On the 18th Hole at the Belfry Brabazon Course lies a plaque in the middle of the fairway to mark the famous 2-Iron to that Christie O Connor Junior played in the 1989 Ryder Cup. Only time will tell if we will be successful in our application for a plaque to mark the five Trevor Trophy golfers who stuck their ball into the water from this distance this year including Toby on his way to a glorious half with Jon after halving the hole in 8…. now that’s matchplay golf Mr O’Connor. Of course, being in the middle of the fairway few Trevorers noticed the plaque anyway.
However, the majesty of this hole and indeed the Brabazon course will go down in Trevor memory. What won’t go down in Trevor memory is what can only be described as the “pylon” course with 30,000 volts on every single hole awaiting a high wedge or a wandering Trevor ball seeker.
What will also be quickly forgotten is the flukey and unbelievably lucky ROW win over the OHA in this year’s historic 25th Trevor. The 43-35 point win to the ROW masks the fantastic victory that OHA won in the singles again taking their overall historic lead in the singles to 21 points (173-152). The fact that this victory fell so short of the ROW’s record win in 2014 must be of great concern to their new Captain, Major Matt Watson. Yes, if you are OHA and clutched straws is your thing, then this is the place to read about this years Trevor.
On the 18th Hole at the Belfry Brabazon Course lies a plaque in the middle of the fairway to mark the famous 2-Iron to that Christie O Connor Junior played in the 1989 Ryder Cup. Only time will tell if we will be successful in our application for a plaque to mark the five Trevor Trophy golfers who stuck their ball into the water from this distance this year including Toby on his way to a glorious half with Jon after halving the hole in 8…. now that’s matchplay golf Mr O’Connor. Of course, being in the middle of the fairway few Trevorers noticed the plaque anyway.
However, the majesty of this hole and indeed the Brabazon course will go down in Trevor memory. What won’t go down in Trevor memory is what can only be described as the “pylon” course with 30,000 volts on every single hole awaiting a high wedge or a wandering Trevor ball seeker.
What will also be quickly forgotten is the flukey and unbelievably lucky ROW win over the OHA in this year’s historic 25th Trevor. The 43-35 point win to the ROW masks the fantastic victory that OHA won in the singles again taking their overall historic lead in the singles to 21 points (173-152). The fact that this victory fell so short of the ROW’s record win in 2014 must be of great concern to their new Captain, Major Matt Watson. Yes, if you are OHA and clutched straws is your thing, then this is the place to read about this years Trevor.
The reality is, however, that OHA were flogged again and the overall score is now 14-11. Even if OHA produced the comeback of this millennium (and the last millennium as we’ve been going that long) to produce back to back to back wins by 2026, the OHA will by then have several players of UK pensionable age and the chances of taking the lead in 2026 will depend more on BUPA than any skilled coach or inspirational leader. The red faces of the battle weary OHA following another chastening defeat was enough to make ROW feel so sorry for them that the 2023 Trevor will feature a reduced playing workload. And so Captain Jack walks away with a 100% win record this year and OH Captain Nicky “Havent played since the Trevor last Year” Andrews will now face off with Major Matt in 2023. With the ROW now retrospectively naming all their captains with military titles, it isnt just the golf the OHA are falling behind in. At least with the Lord Trevor dominating proceedings he could shepherd the ROW around like sheep with such detailed instructions to keep them quiet but now not even Mao Tse-Tung could have conducted such a complete cultural revolution as the ROW have.
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Even the clever clever tactic of last minute withdrawals forcing the Trevor gods into drastic measures to put two ROW players Piers and Simmo into the OH team wasn’t enough even though they were amongst the most successful players OHA produced. We can only imagine what kind of Games of Throne like ceremony occurred in a deep dark dungeon to see Piers and Simmo draw the shortest of straws to be led out with white hoods over their heads to the ignominy of OH status but it can’t have been worth it. That said, if anyone looked like he was ready to go back to school, and a proper one at that, it was Simmo and I garner he would have made a very fine OH prefect.
But far more important than the result (always the case when ROW win anyway) was the weekend itself. Of course there was absent friends as usual…. Gazza (“gizza job”), JG (“consecutive years with you hackers you’re joking”), and Buster (“Injured, new job, sorry who did you say was calling again?”). |
We missed them all. But a post covid return for many was a delight and this is surely one of the most convivial Trevors since we all sighed relief that Joey and Colin weren’t at each others throats again. Of particular returning note was Richard “book ‘em Danno” Evans who canoed across the Atlantic single handedly to make the Trevor and didn’t mention his exploits once.
Whilst all agreed that the Belfry was slightly industrial in scale, it all worked with fantastic evening rooms and good service. There were enough different bars to ensure the other 15,000 golfers on site didn’t trip over each other and the courses were excellent but the chances of the Belfry seeing Trevorers again are likely slim given the Belfry version of “happy hour” was the bar staff pissing themselves watching the look on golfers faces when paying for their first post round beers. |
Without a “drink one, get one free campaign” in future years to rebalance the TT books it is likely off the circuit for a few years. Not even on an onsite nightclub could save the day though a few boys did manage to catch a glimpse of disco dick on the dance floor but the word was that the TT nightclub reaction from the local divorcees has deteriorated from “they’re even too old for us” to “now they’re just embarrassing themselves”. Leafy’s boyish good looks have gone and with one or two exceptions, the locals were looking up the collective noun for beer guts as soon as the boys got in the door (“gaggle of guts”?).
But this really was a great Trevor – a brilliantly bizarre quiz from the saint that somehow worked but nobody knew why. A nostalgic evening of video from years gone past on the final night and just top banter, top company and some very pleasant golf into the bargain. With the years rolling on we are all still alive (incredibly) and the perspective of life has seen a hard nose golf competition with jangling Lyneham nerves give way to a weekend that combines enough competition to keep an interesting edge with a plethora of comradery from all sides. It is too big a stretch to say that the OHA don’t care deeply about smashing the ROW rednecks born from parents of ill repute but we have seen a warm and fuzzy feeling resembling OH incontinence that makes this weekend critical to all our lives and well being.
But this really was a great Trevor – a brilliantly bizarre quiz from the saint that somehow worked but nobody knew why. A nostalgic evening of video from years gone past on the final night and just top banter, top company and some very pleasant golf into the bargain. With the years rolling on we are all still alive (incredibly) and the perspective of life has seen a hard nose golf competition with jangling Lyneham nerves give way to a weekend that combines enough competition to keep an interesting edge with a plethora of comradery from all sides. It is too big a stretch to say that the OHA don’t care deeply about smashing the ROW rednecks born from parents of ill repute but we have seen a warm and fuzzy feeling resembling OH incontinence that makes this weekend critical to all our lives and well being.
Other highlights include Waz’s Whatsapp post of the year “Prichy can you post the instructions hourly please”, the amusing story in the Times on the morning of the Trevor about a sex scandal at Hampton School
(no such thing as bad publicity with the school picture in the paper) and Piers jumping ship to avoid another night sleeping with Matt. On the governance side, Copey finally listened to his psychiatrist who’d told him that driving a Ferrari and chasing muppets for a few hundred spons were bad for his mental balance and relinquished his role leaving El Presidento Prichy as the Xi Jingping of the Trevor Trophy. |
A power vacuum never to be filled and it is now difficult to see him ever being unseated from the Throne. Sarjey takes over the reigns as treasurer and a 30 year career working for a bank that once helped plunge the world into deep financial crisis will hold him in good stead.
We now look forward to Dorset (who changed their name from East Dorset immediately after the 1998 Trevor trophy there) where battle resumes and forecasts suggest that Nicky Boy once again won’t hit a shot in the air before Sunday afternoon, Copey will still be recovering from being 4 up with six to play to gift Grant a half and beer consumption will rise due to being half the price of 2022.
As usual, thanks to Prichy, Copey and other facilitators and Jonny Wheeler for becoming the new media man. See below:
We now look forward to Dorset (who changed their name from East Dorset immediately after the 1998 Trevor trophy there) where battle resumes and forecasts suggest that Nicky Boy once again won’t hit a shot in the air before Sunday afternoon, Copey will still be recovering from being 4 up with six to play to gift Grant a half and beer consumption will rise due to being half the price of 2022.
As usual, thanks to Prichy, Copey and other facilitators and Jonny Wheeler for becoming the new media man. See below:
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RESULTS
Day 1
Greensomes Scores
Game 1 Game 2 Game 3 Game 4 Game 5 Game 6 Game 7 Game 8 |
OHA
Toby Leafy & Hoody Nick & Jules JR & Suds Copey & Joey Simmo & Jimmy Piers & Saint Clax & Kill |
ROW
Prich Grant & Kev Col & Jack Pete & Karl Waz & Wyn Dronny & Jon Softers & Matt Sarje & Medsy |
Results
ROW 3&1 ROW 4&2 ROW 2&1 OHA 2up OHA 1up ROW 1up All Square ROW 3&2 |
Morning Score - OHA 2 1/2 ROW 5 1/2
Better Ball Scores
Game 1 Game 2 Game 3 Game 4 Game 5 Game 6 Game 7 Game 8 |
OHA
Copey Suds & Hoody Leafy & Jules JR & Nick Clax & Piers Simmo & Joey Toby & Jimmy Kill & Disco |
ROW
Grant Waz & Karl Dronny & Jack Sarje & Prich Matt & Wyn Softers & Kev Pete & Medsy Col & Jon |
Results
All Square OHA 5&3 All Square ROW 2&1 OHA 2&1 All Square ROW 1up ROW 5&4 |
Afternoon Score - OHA 7 ROW 9
Day 1 Score - OHA 9 1/2 ROW 14 1/2
Day 2
Greensome Scores
Game 1 Game 2 Game 3 Game 4 Game 5 Game 6 Game 7 Game 8 |
OHA
Leafy Nick & Hoody JR & Jules Disco & Copey Clax & Toby Piers & Suds (Jan) Joey & Jimmy Simmo & Killer |
ROW
Col Matt & Medsy Sarje & Jon Pete & Jack Softers & Karl Dronny & Wyn Waz & Kev Grant & Prich |
Result
ROW 2&1 ROW 3&2 OHA 2&1 All Square ROW 4&3 OHA 4&2 All Square All Square |
Morning Score - OHA 3 1/2 ROW 4 1/2
Better Ball Scores
Game 1 Game 2 Game 3 Game 4 Game 5 Game 6 Game 7 Game 8 |
OHA
Clax Leafy & Suds Hoody & Disco JR & Killer Nick & Simmo Piers & Jimmy Copey & Toby Jules & Joey |
ROW
Matt Medsy & Col Dronny & Prich Sarje & Wyn Grant & Karl Pete & Kev Softers & Jon Waz & Jack |
Result
ROW 6&4 OHA 5&3 ROW 2up ROW 1up OHA 2up ROW 2&1 ROW 5&4 OHA 1up |
Afternoon Score - OHA 6 ROW 10
Day 2 Score - OHA 9 1/2 ROW 14 1/2
OVERALL Score - OHA 19 ROW 29
Day 3 -
Singles Scores
Game 1 Game 2 Game 3 Game 4 Game 5 Game 6 Game 7 Game 8 Game 9 Game 10 Game 11 Game 12 Game 13 Game 14 Game 15 |
OHA
Piers Disco Leafy Nick Joey Simmo Hoody Copey Clax Jimmy H Killer Dsuds JR Jules Toby |
ROW
Matt Waz Grant Jack Sarje Prich Col Pete Softers Karl Wyn Dronny Kev Medsy Jon |
Result
OHA 2up ROW 7&5 ROW 4&2 ROW 7&5 OHA 7&5 OHA 2up ROW 3&1 OHA 4&3 ROW 7&6 ROW 2up OHA 2&1 ROW 3&2 OHA 1up OHA 5&4 OHA 1up |
Day 3 Score - OHA 16 ROW 14
OVERALL Score - OHA 35 ROW 43
2022 Player Stats
OHA Team
Suds (Jan sub) Joey JR Jules Piers Copey Simmo Clax Hoody Killer Leafy Nick Toby Disco (4 rounds) Jimmy Saint (1 round) |
% (Wins & Points)
80% (4 Wins, 3 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 4.25 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 3 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 4 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 3.75 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 3.75 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 3.75 pts) 20% (1 Win, 1 pts) 20% (1 Win, 1 pts) 20% (1 Win, 2.25 pts) 20% (1 Win, 1.5 pts) 20% (1 Win, 1 pts) 20% (1 Win, 2 pts) 0% (0 Wins, 0.25 pts) 0% (0 Wins, 0.25 pts) 0% (0 Wins, 0.25 pts) |
ROW Team
Col Softers Dronny Prich Jon Medsy Sarje Grant Jack Kev Matt Pete Karl Waz Wyn |
% (Wins & Points)
80% (4 Wins, 4 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 5 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 4 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 4 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 3 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 3 pts) 60% (3 Wins, 3 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 4 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 4 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 4 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 3 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 3 pts) 40% (2 Wins, 2 pts) 20% (1 Win, 2 pts) 20% (1 Win, 1 pts) |
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